Is it possible to be sharp and blurry at the same time? The picture above proves that yes, an image can tell a story despite the contradicting situation going on simultaneously. This brings to mind my son. He fascinates me as he navigates fifth grade. Anyone who has seen, Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader, knows that 5th grade isn’t as easy as it looks. It’s deceivingly difficult for unsuspecting kids and even worst on the parents that have forgotten everything they ever learned before 1990. Despite having a daughter who has moved on to upper middle school with success, every new family member that enters fifth grade must endure a boot camp of sorts. He or she must pay the piper after years of blowing off math facts. Reading is suddenly something that seriously needs comprehension. Even more of a shocker; a test can have an atom bomb dropping effect. I’ll never forget when my daughter came home excited upon her first test result of a 60%. I cocked my head waiting for the answer of the dreaded question, “60 out of 60 or 100?” It would take months to sort things out. After my son’s bombed moon phase test, we realized it just may take quite a few moon phases to get it right. However, with child number two, I’m beginning to wise up. Here are some of my parenting red flag moments. When you ask the kid if he has studied for the test and he replies with a quick “yup” followed by an even faster exit from the room …worry. When your child spends more time opening the door of the fridge, peering into the abyss, looking for brain-food rather than studying...worry. If he guarantees you a 100% on his next test with the convincing smile of the Cheshire cat …worry. When he tells you he was the first one finished because the test was sooooo easy…panic. The dichotomy that my child can be as sharp as a tack and fuzzy beyond comprehension all in the same breath has me wondering if I should have drank more V8 while I was pregnant. Just in case, the other day we banished all chocolate frosted sugar bombs from the breakfast menu and replaced them with unprocessed Toasty O’s. I’m counting on the hope that someday this picture will come into focus. For now, we’ll squint and try to see a light at the end of the tunnel despite our bumping into the walls. For a while, some may be smarter than my fifth grader, but I have a hunch that when his day comes, the prize will be his.
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July 2018
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